First Time quitting a job..

Yes Finally after 4 months of having my first job I finally quit..
The job is not really hard you won't be tired physically but really your mind would go down fall..
Its a mental warfare where the boss has very loud noise and sometime if not always the boss quarrel with the customers. I personally love the work I can easily neglect the hot tempered boss but still 4months of improper sleep and mental stress really made me tired. And the bond there is so freaking scary as if they would do something to me if I quit. Now need to find a new job. And I also lied so that I can quit the job, that would be stupid but I had no choice If I really wanted to quit. Well lying is part of being human as long as you won't make it a hobby.
lol I was always thinking what to do after I quit then today I had not sleep and stayed awake playing, watching anime, and reading manga. although I finished reading some manga and anime I am still unsatisfied. why? maybe because I am still human. Annoying as it seems I have no choice unless I want to kill my self then I am no longer living. For 4 months I had imprison my self and hope that if I quit this job I would be free but I wonder if that is still possible.
((10/17/09 5:21 pm)@J1 Sandawa Net-X)

Happy Birthday..

Here I am again at this day
To great you in a joyful way
Since it is the day I should be Thankful
because you had always been wonderful.

It might be one sided and selfish
but rest assured I am no fetish
A promise I made with my self out of stupidity
To continue even if it has no meaning for eternity.

As always I am your stranger out of blue
A person who's character and face you have no clue.
But I am no stalker who wants to be near you,
I am just me who thinks about you..

So sad to think that a gift I cannot give
and hope you have plenty to receive
If none then don't be deceive
Your life is the best gift you had ever receive..

If you are alone in the edge of darkness
Just spread your wings in the sky of loneliness.
And you will see the world is not yours to have
but rather it is the only thing your heart could love..

Hated, Envy, Jealousy ,Loneliness, Feeling worthless,
and thought that you are the very meaning of darkness.
Then think of me as weaker than you,
Since you are my only Angel above the sky so blue..

Happy Birthday a simple words I could easily say
And Be happy and content on this very day.
Special or not I am no where to stay,
Just s single smile is enough for thats the only wish For you I could pray..

First of all this is dedicated to my one and only Angel..Happy Birthday!!
Funny since I always admire her don't know why..( And his a total stranger to me)
will I am that kind of a person.. I hope you could also read this..
The reason I think why I never approach her was not because I am very shy(although its one of the reason) maybe because If I befriend here then the word stranger would be lost.. lol I am really weird hahaha to like someone for more than 7-8years? and never tried to meet her even though I had plenty of opportunities and time.. All my message for your Birthday had been said at my poem.. then again I am bad with english so please be patient to understand it :P..

-Leafrust

Leafrust

Imagine a Single Leaf in a tree
If it fall would it be free?
If it stay would one can see
A lonely leaf that has no right to be free..

Have you been happy this day?
A joyful heart I had always Envy..
You who had some friends to comfort your heart,
Mine is a single curse where everything had start..

You who had been not known
The only thing I wish to own
And yet you had been born
To a place where I could not return..

How long had I been like this,
This memory I could not dismiss.
Years may had past when I first look at you,
And still here I am who don't know what to do..

Such a fool to understand my soul
much worst is my hunger like a ghoul,
And yet I wish not to eat,
Since it will show my one and only defeat..

To smile with an empty feeling,
And laugh with a heart that is crying.
A single soul not worth remembering,
A child I am born with selfish misunderstanding..

I live a world I had known
And yet one self can't be shown
Since it is created by my own
A world filled with lies and unknown..

Why has always been my question,
And No has been my Inspiration
But still my heart has no objection
To a life that is near once destruction..

Would It End If one is gone and Disappear,
Or rather continue with the punishment of a reaper.
A punishment that has no pain nor suffering,
Just an eternal darkness of everything..

It has been 2 months since I write something at my lonely blog..
well I had been busy lately I got my self I job that best fit my computer time..
I can now log in 4-6 hours at the price of half since I am just using pc inside an internet cafe..
I also became I quiet addicted in reading manga..
well The reason I blog today is to write some poem because a special someone is having a birthday.. as always I feel writing a poem about her..
Even though my English is Bad.. hey I am doing my very best here hahaha..

Series Info

Title: Ichigo 100%
Alternate Title: Strawberry 100%
OM Rank: 51
Categories: anime, comedy, ecchi, harem, romance, shounen

Author: Mizuki Kawashita

Artist: Mizuki Kawashita

Chapters: 167 - completed

Summary

Manaka Junpei, one day goes to the roof of his school to get a beautiful view of his town. On the roof Junpei encounters a beautiful school girl who falls on top of him exposing her strawberry panties. The girl runs away before Junpei can find out her name. Junpei who aspires to become a filmaker thinks this encounter would be a perfect scene in a movie. So his search to find this girl begins with only one clue that she wears strawberry panties.

Taken From OneManga.com [Click Here]

Leafrust,

Lol, first of all this is definitely without doubt one of the best so far.. I had finish reading this 3 days ago and today I had finish watching this in Anime since I can't wait to see the difference between anime and manga which is sad to say but Manga is still the best..

Manaka was really something a character which is really funny.. with all the beautifull girls around him choosing one would really be a sin.. And he is also dedicated to his dream(which I had none At the moment) *speechless* overall really something especially the ending I had never guess it right I neglected all the hint after the ending and at the end I could shake hands with the author he gave a natural and perfect ending.. Maybe many would dis agree but It was really good..

The Anime is really bad even though the OVA's is really something but the anime is just half I don't know what happen but the creator of the Anime didn't finish the overall story..

Will I must stop reading Manga since I am doing this for 2 weeks now and its not really good for a person who doesn't like reality to much.. If I where in a very bad mental state I would commit suicide after reading it because that would be a nice story to remember before a death..

I was satisfied with the ending and I would like reading it again.. And I had been watching Suzuka anime I hope to finish it sooner or later.. I might be alone at the moment but that doesn't mean I can easily kill my self.. I really hate the way I think I am what you can call am idiot Being.. I am smart enough to live such useless life.. maybe because I am still looking and with some little silly dream I am still continue living.. Read it I promise a tear drop after you done reading it lol..

-Leafrust